Whether in the movies, through friends in real life, or common knowledge, it’s no surprise that divorce is a contentious process. Spouses fight over property, kids, and almost every other issue you can imagine. And, if you’ve been putting off divorce to avoid all of this, there’s good news:
It doesn’t have to be this way.
Too many couples assume divorce has to be warfare. However, it can be an amicable process that lessens the expense, stress, and emotional turmoil inherent to it. Read on to learn 3 tips that will help keep your divorce less contentious.
Tip #1: Be Willing to Compromise
Many couples begin the divorce process and are feeling upset, hurt, angry, or a combination of all three. The problem is that this often fuels disagreement in a case and leaves both spouses unwilling to compromise on issues.
Fighting over property, children, and other assets up for division will only prolong the case and increase ill will in the process. Thus, you must be willing to compromise.
Be realistic about what you want and understand that you may have to concede some of what you want to settle your case and avoid trial. Also be aware that if you don’t compromise, it doesn’t mean you’ll get everything you want. If your case goes to trial, the fate of all contended issues are in the judge’s hands and his or her final word will be your divorce judgment (and can’t be changed).
Tip #2: Focus on Your Goals
It’s all too easy to get caught up in minor issues in divorce, especially if you dislike your spouse. However, these small issues can often lead to big problems, especially if you spend too much time and money disagreeing about something inconsequential to the big picture.
For example, some spouses fight about household belongings when dividing property, including cleaning supplies. This sounds far-fetched but it’s easy to focus on minor details to “stick it” to your spouse as your divorce unfolds.
Stay focused on your major goals – like providing a stable environment for your children and receiving an equitable division of property – to prevent getting bogged down in matters that don’t matter at all.
Tip #3: Don’t Rule Out Alternative Dispute Resolution
Even if you and your spouse get along, the divorce process itself can create conflict. This is why many couples that are willing to work together choose an alternative dispute resolution technique – such as mediation or collaborative divorce – instead of litigation (also known as the “traditional” method of divorce).
Both mediation and collaborative divorce take your case out of the courtroom as much as possible and allow you to discuss matters with your spouse and a mediator (third party) or through attorneys (collaborative divorce) to reach a settlement. You should consider both before assuming you must use litigation to resolve your case.
Contact Lawrence R. Surinak Ltd. for More Information and Assistance
Lawrence R. Surinak Ltd. is a family and divorce law firm with over 35 years of experience. As your Naperville divorce lawyer, Larry is glad to explore alternatives to traditional litigation or answer other questions you may have about making the divorce process less contentious.
Contact Larry at 630-470-9990 to take advantage of your free, 30-minute consultation. You may also request your consultation using our online form. We look forward to offering our assistance and expertise to help you make the correct decision to keep your divorce less contentious and enjoy the benefits that come with doing so.